Full Circle of Living and Dying
  • Home
    • Donate Here
  • About us/Contact
    • Board of Directors >
      • Akhila Murphy, Founding Director, End-of-Life Doula, Death Care Midwife
      • Carolyn Seyler, Co-Chair President
      • Rosie Mariani, Board Treasurer
      • Mary Good, End-of-Life Doula, Secretary of the Board
      • Amanda Kenney, Death-Care Midwife, Board Director
      • Mary Jo Curtin, Board Director
    • FCLD Core Circle Volunteer Team >
      • Bonnie McKeegan, LCSW, Past Vice President Board Director
      • Martha Turner, Midwifery, Past President
      • Linda More, End-of-Life Doula, Past Board Director
      • Donna Peizer, Past Treasurer
      • Nandi Szabo, Co-Founder
      • Nancy Parraz, Death Care Midwife
      • Sushila Mertens, End-of-Life Doula >
        • Sushila Mertens, End-of-Life Doula, Outstanding Volunteer of the Year!
        • Spotlight Sushila Mertens
      • Rebecca Sengolu
    • Advocates for end-of-life choices and death-care rights
    • FAQ
    • What is an End-of-Life Doula or Death Midwife?
    • Sign up for Newsletter/send email
    • Contact Us
    • Pregnancy and Infant Loss >
      • Cuddle Cot 2021
      • Support group: Pregnancy and Infant Loss
    • Gallery
    • Donate Here
    • JOIN OUR TEAM
    • Our Education >
      • Our Final Passages Death Midwifery Training
      • Home Funeral Article by Jerrigrace Lyons
  • In-Home Funeral Guidance
    • Know your rights. Home death care is legal.
    • Home Death Care in California >
      • Home Funeral Paperwork
    • CALIFORNIA DEATH CERTIFICATE Instructions
    • Tattoo Preservation after Death
    • Death Care >
      • Sacred Death Care
    • What is "Lying in Honor?"
    • Symbolism of our LOGO
    • Donate Here
    • Pet Funeral >
      • Pet Euthanasia in the Home
    • Death Certificate Worksheet >
      • Nevada County-File Your Own Paperwork for Death Certificate - Vital Records Office
    • Video: A Conversation about After Death Care
  • End-of-Life Care Options
    • Pregnancy and Infant Loss >
      • Support group: Pregnancy and Infant Loss
      • Cuddle Cot 2021
    • Advance Directives, Dementia, Covid-19, Five Wishes
    • End-of-Life Doula
    • California End of Life Option Act (MAID)
    • VSED: Voluntarily Stopping Eating & Drinking
    • Sacred Bridges, Local End-of-Life Caregivers
    • Remembrances
    • Contributions
    • Testimonials
    • Physician Support: Medical Aid in Dying
  • Green Burial
    • History of Natural Green Burial, Cherokee Cemetery, Nevada County >
      • Green Burial Santa Monica 2016
      • Green Burial Video from GBC
    • Natural Organic Reduction -Composting Human Remains >
      • Presentation: Natural Organic Reduction + YouTube link
    • Natural Organic Reduction Amigo Bob's story
    • Rules for Scattering Ashes
    • Find A Grave (website)
    • Aquamation: Water Cremation >
      • Desmond Tutu: Aquamation
    • Cremation- Not so Environmentally Friendly!
  • Events & News
    • Upcoming Educational Series MAR 14, 2023: AS YOU WISH: Creating a Beautiful End-of-Life
    • Upcoming March 16, 2023 Death Conversations Event
    • Presentation April 30, 2023 In-Home Death Care
    • Past event Aquamation Presentation Jan. 18, 2023 link to recording
    • Past Death Conversations Event Nov. 17, 2022
    • Past Film Event: Jack Has a Plan Aug. 2022
    • LA TIMES Article about Lawsuit Aug. 2022
    • Article: Death Doula Lawsuit Dec. 2021 >
      • California Death Doulas Fight
      • Death Doulas C&C Article Nov. 2021
    • Article: Pregnancy Loss Conversations Feb, 2022
    • Past Event June 24, 2022 Presentation Organ and Tissue donation
    • Past Event Apr. 28, 2022 After-death Care presentation
    • PAST March 26, 2022 Cemetery Field Trip
    • Past Event March 17, 2022 Death Conversations- Breaking the silence
    • Past Event Jan 20, 2022 Death Conversations- Breaking the silence
    • Review: 2021 City of Hope, End:0f-Life Symposium December
    • PAST EVENTS 2021 >
      • Presentation Dec. 9th : "There's No Place Like Home." Home funeral Basics
      • Past Event: Nov. 2021- Medical Aid-in-Dying Update
      • Past Event: Natural Organic Reduction - Register
      • Past Events 2021 : June 18 -Field trip to Cherokee Cemetery
    • Newsletters
    • KVMR Podcasts: Featuring End-of-LIfe Doulas
    • PUBLISHED ARTICLES >
      • Article from The Order of the Good Death
      • Article: California's End-of-LIfe Option Act
      • Article Amigo Bob -Natural Organic Reduction Human Composting
      • April 2020 Ventilators in times of COVID-19
      • Union Article Caring Cradle Sept 2019
      • Giving Back After Tragedy, September 2019 The Union
      • Article The Union May 2019 New nonprofit
      • Article The Union August 2019 HBO Documentary
      • Choosing When to Die
      • Home Funeral Visitation
    • PAST EVENTS 2019/20 >
      • Past Event Oct 7 & 8, 2020 Holding Space for Pregnancy Loss
      • Death & Grieving around Corona Virus March 26, 2020
      • Past Event: Jan 26, 2020 Your Life, Your Choice, Your Plan
      • End-of-Life Doula Training with Inspired Endings - Oct 2019
      • June 9, 2019 Short Film & Death Conversation
      • Mar, Apr, May 2019
      • SEPT 2019 EVENT: Advance Directives + Dementia Directive
    • 2018 Past Events >
      • A Matter of Life & Death: Workshop Series Sept. 22, 2018
      • Nandi's Cancer Support Group September-October 2018
      • Past Events: 2018
      • Event May 20, 2018- Creating a Death Care Plan: Exploring Unconventional Options
      • Event: July 22, 2018 Death Cafe
    • 2017 PAST Events: August 27th -Understanding California's End-of-LIfe Option Act >
      • Deathwalker Training with Zenith Virago Sept 2017
      • Past Event: Film screening: Zen & the Art of Dying August 13, 2017
      • PAST Event: Film screening: Zen and the Art of Dying June 11, 2017
      • Past Event: Death Salon, A Gathering of Community to Discuss Death -MAR 26
      • Past Event - Exploring After Death Options: What Happens to our Bodily Remains? Feb 19, 2017 2-4pm
      • Going Out Green: Learn about Eco-friendly Home Funerals and Green Burial Cemetery JAN. 8, 2017
      • International Death Doula Training 2017
    • 2016 Events Planning Your Own Send-off May 1, 2016 >
      • Stephen Jenkinson Comes to NC March 14, 2016
      • Education, Presentations, Death Cafe
      • Event: Sunday Aug 28 2-4pm Home Funerals & Green Burial
    • EARLY YEARS 2013-2015 EVENTS
  • Resources
    • MAiD/California End of Life Option Act + Update SB 380 >
      • Links for California's End-of-Life Option Act
    • Bereavement Support in Nevada County >
      • Bereavement support Hospice of the Foothills, Nevada County
      • Grief Support: Jemma Skye Champeau
    • Advance Directives California + Dementia
    • Hospice of the Foothills, Nevada County
    • Senior Outreach Services, Nevada County
    • One Source Empowering Caregivers
    • Pregnancy and Infant Loss >
      • Cuddle Cot 2021
      • Union Article Caring Cradle 2019
    • Support group: Pregnancy and Infant Loss
    • End-of-Life Plan of Care
    • American Clinicians Academy on Medical Aid in Dying >
      • ACAMAID: Mixing medications
    • Physicians & Local Pharmacy >
      • Dr. Stephen Banister, Nevada County
    • VSED: Voluntarily Stopping Eating & Drinking >
      • Supporting a Loved One at End of Life
    • Body / Organ Donation
    • Threshold Choir
    • Resources and Links
    • People in the Death Trade & Training
    • Holding Space
  • FAQ
  • Companions for Pregnancy Loss
    • Cuddle Cot 2021
  • Death Related YouTube
  • Beauty of EOL Study
  • JOIN OUR TEAM
  • Bardo, Buddhism and the Art of Dying
  • Accomplishments
  • Remembrance donation
  • Kids Sit Vigil with their Granny
  • Sharon's End-of-life days
  • Nearing Death Awareness
  • After-Death Care of my Mom by Akhiila Murphy
  • Archive Video FCLD Collective
  • A Remembrance Gathering for Mom?
  • Marina Bokelman Legacy
  • Register for Aguamation
Picture
PicturePhoto submitted by Jia Christopher

Parents give to Nevada County hospital to honor their dead child
September 26, 2019
Sam Corey, Staff Writer


Jia Christopher, middle right, has her son speak during a fundraising event last week. Christopher is creating a foundation to honor her dead daughter Neve, and give back to different communities.


Jia Christopher and her husband didn’t anticipate being where they are today.It seems impossible anyone could have. Christopher and her husband’s child, Neve, died May 21 in the womb at 37 weeks.


As Christopher was preparing for a Caesarean section, she called Nevada County’s Akhila Murphy, a death doula — someone who facilitates the end-of-life process.
“For that to come into your ears is pretty shocking,” said Murphy, who as a co-founder of Full Circle of Living & Dying, had never dealt with a stillbirth before. Murphy acted as the couple’s advocate, helping answer questions about keeping Neve in the room with them to say goodbye, and inquiring about the Christophers personally transferring their daughter to the crematorium.

Due to the Christophers’ openness and forwardness, and the assistance of Murphy, they were able to stay with their daughter for a few days in the hospital and remain with her until she was cremated. “It was important to us that our baby was with us the whole time,” said Christopher.
Months later, the family wanted to honor their child, and give back.

As of Monday, they raised over $10,000 and purchased two Caring Cradles — one being donated to Sierra Nevada Memorial Hospital and the other to Mercy Hospital of Folsom, the latter where Christopher gave birth — to thank Akhila Murphy for her help. The cradles work to slow the decomposition process, providing parents who experience stillbirth more time with their newborn. Since a fundraising event last week, Christopher said the family is about halfway to purchasing another Caring Cradle, and are working to establish a foundation in Neve’s honor. Future money raised will be used to purchase and donate cradles.
​
HELP DURING GRIEF
While in the hospital, the Christophers didn’t know who to call when they learned of the death of their child. But they needed help, and Christopher, who had been tracking Murphy’s work, decided to reach out. “Of all of the people in the world that I needed, it was a total stranger, and it was Akhila Murphy,” said Christopher. Because of the shock experienced by the family, Christopher said Murphy’s help was critical. Being someone they could speak with, who could speak on their behalf, and who could transmit their questions about hospital policy regarding infant death was incredibly helpful.
“She made so many difficult phone calls,” said Christopher, later adding, “She became our advocate.”
What Murphy gave them — and what the Christophers hope to provide others — is time. The parents wanted things to slow down so they could study Neve’s face and memorize her features before having to leave the hospital, and officially say goodbye to their daughter. “Basically the clock is ticking and you’ll never get to see them again,” said Christopher.
Without a Caring Cradle of their own, the Christophers put their baby in ice to slow the decomposition process.
Murphy, meanwhile, was working with the family’s birth doula and talking with hospital staff about the Christophers’ options.
“I will always appreciate (Murphy’s) kindness to us at the hardest time of our life,” said Christopher.

GIVING BACK
Months later, Christopher wanted to give back, and honor her daughter’s legacy. She found that hospitals often don’t have something like a Caring Cradle because they aren’t considered a “medical necessity.” Initially anticipating only purchasing one cradle for the Folsom hospital, she was surprised when an outpouring of community support allowed her to purchase a second one — and likely more in the near future.
“I think the hardest thing for when you lose a baby or a child is thinking their story is over,” she said. “Her story isn’t over now.”
To thank Murphy for her help and guidance, the Christophers decided to donate a cradle to Nevada County’s Sierra Nevada Memorial Hospital.
“It is going to be wonderful for us to have anything at the facility that brings greater comfort and peace to families who suffered a tragedy,” said Sierra Nevada Memorial Hospital Foundation Executive Director Kimberly Parker, adding that she didn’t know when the cradle would arrive at the hospital.
When Murphy learned about the gift, she was in tears.
“This, to me, is a huge victory,” she said, adding that it’s also an opportunity for hospitals to expand how they consider and practice death.
The family’s forwardness and openness about the process, said Murphy, allowed their friends to more easily speak to them about the tragedy and help them through it. “I feel like it was therapeutic for them,” she said.

For Christopher and her family, helping others was not just one possible way forward, it was the best way to navigate life.
“I wanted to show my son, when something terrible happens, the best way to heal is to do something good,” she said.
To contact Staff Writer Sam Corey at scorey@theunion.com or call 530-477-4219.

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  • Home
    • Donate Here
  • About us/Contact
    • Board of Directors >
      • Akhila Murphy, Founding Director, End-of-Life Doula, Death Care Midwife
      • Carolyn Seyler, Co-Chair President
      • Rosie Mariani, Board Treasurer
      • Mary Good, End-of-Life Doula, Secretary of the Board
      • Amanda Kenney, Death-Care Midwife, Board Director
      • Mary Jo Curtin, Board Director
    • FCLD Core Circle Volunteer Team >
      • Bonnie McKeegan, LCSW, Past Vice President Board Director
      • Martha Turner, Midwifery, Past President
      • Linda More, End-of-Life Doula, Past Board Director
      • Donna Peizer, Past Treasurer
      • Nandi Szabo, Co-Founder
      • Nancy Parraz, Death Care Midwife
      • Sushila Mertens, End-of-Life Doula >
        • Sushila Mertens, End-of-Life Doula, Outstanding Volunteer of the Year!
        • Spotlight Sushila Mertens
      • Rebecca Sengolu
    • Advocates for end-of-life choices and death-care rights
    • FAQ
    • What is an End-of-Life Doula or Death Midwife?
    • Sign up for Newsletter/send email
    • Contact Us
    • Pregnancy and Infant Loss >
      • Cuddle Cot 2021
      • Support group: Pregnancy and Infant Loss
    • Gallery
    • Donate Here
    • JOIN OUR TEAM
    • Our Education >
      • Our Final Passages Death Midwifery Training
      • Home Funeral Article by Jerrigrace Lyons
  • In-Home Funeral Guidance
    • Know your rights. Home death care is legal.
    • Home Death Care in California >
      • Home Funeral Paperwork
    • CALIFORNIA DEATH CERTIFICATE Instructions
    • Tattoo Preservation after Death
    • Death Care >
      • Sacred Death Care
    • What is "Lying in Honor?"
    • Symbolism of our LOGO
    • Donate Here
    • Pet Funeral >
      • Pet Euthanasia in the Home
    • Death Certificate Worksheet >
      • Nevada County-File Your Own Paperwork for Death Certificate - Vital Records Office
    • Video: A Conversation about After Death Care
  • End-of-Life Care Options
    • Pregnancy and Infant Loss >
      • Support group: Pregnancy and Infant Loss
      • Cuddle Cot 2021
    • Advance Directives, Dementia, Covid-19, Five Wishes
    • End-of-Life Doula
    • California End of Life Option Act (MAID)
    • VSED: Voluntarily Stopping Eating & Drinking
    • Sacred Bridges, Local End-of-Life Caregivers
    • Remembrances
    • Contributions
    • Testimonials
    • Physician Support: Medical Aid in Dying
  • Green Burial
    • History of Natural Green Burial, Cherokee Cemetery, Nevada County >
      • Green Burial Santa Monica 2016
      • Green Burial Video from GBC
    • Natural Organic Reduction -Composting Human Remains >
      • Presentation: Natural Organic Reduction + YouTube link
    • Natural Organic Reduction Amigo Bob's story
    • Rules for Scattering Ashes
    • Find A Grave (website)
    • Aquamation: Water Cremation >
      • Desmond Tutu: Aquamation
    • Cremation- Not so Environmentally Friendly!
  • Events & News
    • Upcoming Educational Series MAR 14, 2023: AS YOU WISH: Creating a Beautiful End-of-Life
    • Upcoming March 16, 2023 Death Conversations Event
    • Presentation April 30, 2023 In-Home Death Care
    • Past event Aquamation Presentation Jan. 18, 2023 link to recording
    • Past Death Conversations Event Nov. 17, 2022
    • Past Film Event: Jack Has a Plan Aug. 2022
    • LA TIMES Article about Lawsuit Aug. 2022
    • Article: Death Doula Lawsuit Dec. 2021 >
      • California Death Doulas Fight
      • Death Doulas C&C Article Nov. 2021
    • Article: Pregnancy Loss Conversations Feb, 2022
    • Past Event June 24, 2022 Presentation Organ and Tissue donation
    • Past Event Apr. 28, 2022 After-death Care presentation
    • PAST March 26, 2022 Cemetery Field Trip
    • Past Event March 17, 2022 Death Conversations- Breaking the silence
    • Past Event Jan 20, 2022 Death Conversations- Breaking the silence
    • Review: 2021 City of Hope, End:0f-Life Symposium December
    • PAST EVENTS 2021 >
      • Presentation Dec. 9th : "There's No Place Like Home." Home funeral Basics
      • Past Event: Nov. 2021- Medical Aid-in-Dying Update
      • Past Event: Natural Organic Reduction - Register
      • Past Events 2021 : June 18 -Field trip to Cherokee Cemetery
    • Newsletters
    • KVMR Podcasts: Featuring End-of-LIfe Doulas
    • PUBLISHED ARTICLES >
      • Article from The Order of the Good Death
      • Article: California's End-of-LIfe Option Act
      • Article Amigo Bob -Natural Organic Reduction Human Composting
      • April 2020 Ventilators in times of COVID-19
      • Union Article Caring Cradle Sept 2019
      • Giving Back After Tragedy, September 2019 The Union
      • Article The Union May 2019 New nonprofit
      • Article The Union August 2019 HBO Documentary
      • Choosing When to Die
      • Home Funeral Visitation
    • PAST EVENTS 2019/20 >
      • Past Event Oct 7 & 8, 2020 Holding Space for Pregnancy Loss
      • Death & Grieving around Corona Virus March 26, 2020
      • Past Event: Jan 26, 2020 Your Life, Your Choice, Your Plan
      • End-of-Life Doula Training with Inspired Endings - Oct 2019
      • June 9, 2019 Short Film & Death Conversation
      • Mar, Apr, May 2019
      • SEPT 2019 EVENT: Advance Directives + Dementia Directive
    • 2018 Past Events >
      • A Matter of Life & Death: Workshop Series Sept. 22, 2018
      • Nandi's Cancer Support Group September-October 2018
      • Past Events: 2018
      • Event May 20, 2018- Creating a Death Care Plan: Exploring Unconventional Options
      • Event: July 22, 2018 Death Cafe
    • 2017 PAST Events: August 27th -Understanding California's End-of-LIfe Option Act >
      • Deathwalker Training with Zenith Virago Sept 2017
      • Past Event: Film screening: Zen & the Art of Dying August 13, 2017
      • PAST Event: Film screening: Zen and the Art of Dying June 11, 2017
      • Past Event: Death Salon, A Gathering of Community to Discuss Death -MAR 26
      • Past Event - Exploring After Death Options: What Happens to our Bodily Remains? Feb 19, 2017 2-4pm
      • Going Out Green: Learn about Eco-friendly Home Funerals and Green Burial Cemetery JAN. 8, 2017
      • International Death Doula Training 2017
    • 2016 Events Planning Your Own Send-off May 1, 2016 >
      • Stephen Jenkinson Comes to NC March 14, 2016
      • Education, Presentations, Death Cafe
      • Event: Sunday Aug 28 2-4pm Home Funerals & Green Burial
    • EARLY YEARS 2013-2015 EVENTS
  • Resources
    • MAiD/California End of Life Option Act + Update SB 380 >
      • Links for California's End-of-Life Option Act
    • Bereavement Support in Nevada County >
      • Bereavement support Hospice of the Foothills, Nevada County
      • Grief Support: Jemma Skye Champeau
    • Advance Directives California + Dementia
    • Hospice of the Foothills, Nevada County
    • Senior Outreach Services, Nevada County
    • One Source Empowering Caregivers
    • Pregnancy and Infant Loss >
      • Cuddle Cot 2021
      • Union Article Caring Cradle 2019
    • Support group: Pregnancy and Infant Loss
    • End-of-Life Plan of Care
    • American Clinicians Academy on Medical Aid in Dying >
      • ACAMAID: Mixing medications
    • Physicians & Local Pharmacy >
      • Dr. Stephen Banister, Nevada County
    • VSED: Voluntarily Stopping Eating & Drinking >
      • Supporting a Loved One at End of Life
    • Body / Organ Donation
    • Threshold Choir
    • Resources and Links
    • People in the Death Trade & Training
    • Holding Space
  • FAQ
  • Companions for Pregnancy Loss
    • Cuddle Cot 2021
  • Death Related YouTube
  • Beauty of EOL Study
  • JOIN OUR TEAM
  • Bardo, Buddhism and the Art of Dying
  • Accomplishments
  • Remembrance donation
  • Kids Sit Vigil with their Granny
  • Sharon's End-of-life days
  • Nearing Death Awareness
  • After-Death Care of my Mom by Akhiila Murphy
  • Archive Video FCLD Collective
  • A Remembrance Gathering for Mom?
  • Marina Bokelman Legacy
  • Register for Aguamation